Higher Alignment Compatibility Factors

 Tired and frustrated at not being seen or honored for your way of doing, relating or being?

 

Do you want to understand differences and uncomfortable similarities with your partners?

 

Higher Alignment - Boulder, ColoradoHigher Alignment Compatibility Factors describe the differences in method of response, assimilation, and action amongst individuals. Each person has a natural, creative way of being in the world. We become bewildered when others do not seem to engage us in a way that makes sense. This occurs for two reasons: 1) we have become attached to doing, relating or being in a way that appears foreign to others, causing discomfort; and 2) there is often a disconnect between what is natural for us and how we have been conditioned to behave. This arises from repression (a subtle form of creative denial) experienced in our childhood when, to be accepted, we needed to operate in a way that our parents would approve. Imprinting describes the process of adopting patterns of behavior (not our own) to be accepted by parents and authority figures. When we get locked into ways of being that are not natural, others often ignore us. Our internal disconnects trigger repulsion from others (as people do not want to be reminded of their own inner disconnects or previous repression).

 

Uncomfortable Similarities occur when others are able to express themselves in ways we have previously been denied. Usually an Uncomfortable Similarity reflects a natural ability, gift or insight that threatened the image or authority of another, which we needed to guarantee our survival. Unfortunately, we often forget or end up denying in ourselves, these natural ways of being. This results in both a simultaneous attraction and repulsion, because we unconsciously want to release ourselves from past protective patterns while feeling afraid we will be discounted in the same way that initially created to need to hide our abilities. It is useful to move into this discomfort to recover our connection to our natural creative Self. We will then discover that it is presently only our own self that is keeping these abilities from emerging. Higher Alignment seeks to point out our natural patterns of creative expression, so we come to accept who we are with others.

 

The more we are rejected for the ways we try to connect with and serve others, the harder it is to respond naturally. We become fixed in patterns of behavior that form obstacles in our interactions. This becomes obvious when we operate with preset expectations and cannot operate beyond the comfort zone of our pre-established roles. We expect others to conform to our way of being (if they love us); this creates irritation when they do not. We may even give up trying to win others approval. It is our disconnection with our natural Creative Self and our need to prove that we are competent and capable that reinforces trained ways of being (over how we could naturally solve problems in our own way). It is the perspective of Higher Alignment that much of what we consider useful training actually covers up our natural intelligence and creative capacity, diverting us from the Authentic Life contributions we wish to make.

 

While externally it appears that the Higher Alignment process labels individuals, our intention is to release everyone from the boxes we adopted (inadvertently) as children. What we want is for people to validate their own natural patterns so they can enjoy their lives and contribute more freely. Facilitators trained to recognize these patterns can suggest how others can re-open the past adaptations that have limited their authentic responsiveness. They can see discomfort and disconnection in individuals when they are operating in an imprinted, disassociated manner. The more denial we have about who we are, the more fixed we are in how we operate. Facilitators offer compassion and understanding so we can be seen and supported in our natural ways of being. Each person needs to validate this process. By affirming our truth, it creates an opening for new possibilities. This freedom is itself a reward for the Higher Alignment facilitator. What we want is a world that operates more in alignment with its potential.

 

Higher Alignment’s original research involved 700 couples between 1987 and 1989, and highlighted 37 major areas of differences in relationships. In 1989, we focused on documenting and clarifying the 12 most important differences in a relationship. In 1997, Higher Alignment added two more Compatibility Factors to better explain the Pretense and Imprinting confusion many people experience. We first needed to acknowledge the imprinting of people so they could then be honored in their desire to be seen in their own natural ways. Presently, this makes it easier for individuals to deepen their own process of seeing the various layers of their creative natures. It is Higher Alignment’s experience that individuals are most aware of their Instinctive Factors (Creative Expression Imprinting, Body Type, Pretenses, Birth Order, Personality Goals, Modes and Attitudes), followed by Intellectual Factors (Defense Style, WorldView, Secondary Creative Expression). Higher Alignment seeks to reorient individuals on Intuitive Factors (Pacing, Communication Process, Decision Making Approach and Primary Creative Expression) so that everyone can manifest breakthroughs quickly.

 

While Higher Alignment has written over 3,000 pages describing Compatibility Factors, most of this reading is not necessary if the clients use the guidance of a personal coach. By providing a framework to focus their attention, clients have been able to master an understanding of the compatibility system within a year. One of the primary values of having a coach is that it lets us focus on what is most critical on our individual path. It is also valuable to have a coach who can anticipate potential reactions and introduce new revelations harmlessly. This becomes more important in couples’ coaching sessions where we strive to honor each individual for their gifts while discussing weaknesses without triggering them or their partner in any way. The coach is an example of how to interact in a fluid and flexible manner that maximizes effectiveness and creative expression in a way the client can then model. This helps the client absorb and appreciate the subtleties of creatively engaging differences in others.

 

 

Learning to Appreciate Our Differences and Similarities

 

The key to a more satisfying relationship is our ability to accept ourselves as we are, so we can accept and love our partner where they are.

 

 

People do not give up on their partners because they cease to love them. They give up because they encounter differences that frustrate them or make them feel less. Compatibility Factors provide critical insights that, when understood, can keep relationships functioning smoothly. For every compatibility difference or uncomfortable similarity, Higher Alignment provides solutions to neutralize the effect of these issues. We can continually focus on the problems or choose to create new solutions for our relationships. Let us consider how our differences, when internally understood and appreciated, can provide the flexibility to be with and see our partners in more effective ways.

Higher Alignment will support you in creating the Inner Knowing necessary to facilitate your highest aspirations…

The difference between a successful relationship and one defined by defensive differences can be measured by your willingness to seek understanding and learn something new!

1. Download the Compatibility Document To Explore This Possibility

Download "Appreciating Differences and Similarities"

2. Download the Introductory Document 

Download Intro Compatibility Presentation

3. Enroll In An Intuitive Compatibility Playshop

Link to Playshop Enrollment Information

4. Explore Compatibility Factors to Release Yourself from Patterns of Imprinting that have Marginalized Your Relationship Connections

Call to register for Higher Alignment Intuitive Compatibility Playshop now. The Intuitive Compatibility Playshop is a one day event held on weekends that teaches about differences and uncomfortable similarities.

 

If you are interested in scheduling a private coaching session with Larry Byram either in Lafayette, CO or over the phone, call 303-926-9339 or click here to email Larry. We also have other coaches trained in this process on the Higher Alignment website that can serve your needs. Click here to go to our Coaching page and meet other coaches.

 

Higher Alignment

Our Purpose:

To experience our essential nature and nurture conscious relationships.